Tiny Sleep guides

Sharing the night shift: how two caregivers can split nights

Two caregivers can split nights by taking turns, so each person gets a protected block of sleep. Agree on the plan before bedtime, use one shared safe-sleep routine, and hand off clearly, so nobody has to guess when the baby last ate.

Why it helps to plan

Newborns wake as often as every 1 or 2 hours, which means the people caring for them do too¹. The AAP encourages caregivers to work together on a sleep routine that both of them can do, and to accept help from trusted people¹. Deciding the plan in daylight saves arguments at 3 a.m.

Three ways to split the night

• Shifts. One person covers the first part of the night, say bedtime to 2 a.m., and the other covers 2 a.m. to morning. The person who's off sleeps somewhere quiet. The baby stays in their own crib or bassinet in the room with whoever is on duty, never in the same bed²³.
• Feed and settle. If one person breastfeeds, they feed, and the other changes the diaper, burps, and settles the baby back down.
• Alternate nights. Each person covers whole nights in turn, which works well once night feeds are fewer.

If you're breastfeeding and thinking about bottles at night, ask your pediatrician or a lactation consultant how to fit them into your plan.

Hand off clearly

A good handoff takes a minute. Share:

• when your baby last ate, and how much
• when they last slept and woke
• the last diaper
• any medicine given, and when, so no dose is doubled
• anything unusual, like a fever or a feed that didn't go well

Write it down, on paper or in an app, so the next person doesn't have to wake you to ask.

Stay safe when you're exhausted

When you're very tired, it's tempting to let your baby sleep with you in bed or on the sofa, and that puts your baby at risk. Before a night feed, think about how tired you are¹:

• Don't feed on a couch or armchair. Falling asleep with a baby there raises the risk of a sleep-related death up to 67 times².
• Clear pillows and bedding from where you're feeding.
• Set a phone alarm to go off every few minutes, or listen to a podcast to stay alert.
• Ask the other person to stay up with you if you're struggling.
• If you fall asleep while feeding, put your baby on their back in their crib or bassinet as soon as you wake.

The risk of a sleep-related death is more than 10 times higher when a baby shares a bed with someone who is very tired or has taken something that makes it harder to wake². Whoever is on duty follows the same rules: baby on their back, on a firm, flat surface, with nothing soft around them, in a sleep space of their own²³.

Protect the sleep you get

• Whoever is off duty should go to bed soon after the baby's last feed, and nap when the baby naps¹.
• Keep night feeds dim and quiet, so your baby learns night is for sleeping¹.
• From about 4 months, put your baby down drowsy but awake, which helps them settle on their own⁴.

Ask for help, and watch your own health

If you're on your own, or both of you are worn out, ask a trusted friend or relative to take a block on some nights. Walk them through your safe sleep routine first¹. If you're worried you might have postpartum depression, talk to your doctor, or call or text the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA (1-833-852-6262)¹.

This is general information, not medical advice. Ask your baby's doctor about your own baby.